Being gay or bi is a big problem for me, socially?

No means of insulting gays. But I was watching this gay for pay thing and these men claim to be 100 percent straight and they have sex with men for cash. Now how come they are straight. If you get hard over same sex action. Your not straight. I often ask that question myself. Like I never had sex with a girl. But if I had sex with a guy. I am gay until I have sex with a women. Thus making me bisexual. For me its women=emotional+sex(my sexual appeal for women is declining without my approval, my body is being an A Hole) men= sex+ emotional(but not as on a female level) like the odds of me marrying a man are very very low. But what constitutes as gay. So if I like having sex with men and doing that kinda stuff that makes me gay? Because the only homosexual degree I stood towards was kissing a boy at age 6, being protective of my early childhood friend and close to him. Also fooled around with a kid at a sleep over when I was 10 and I sexually fantasized about some of my male friends. So its obvious that my homosexual feelings are sub conscious. But so are my feelings and sexual attractions towards women.....so where did the balance go. Why do I think about kissing and having sex with men now at 18. its gonna be a changing factor for me in my life. Because I want a women, but can't get hard over one anymore. Its kinda heart breaking. But I am not saying my gay side is bad, I just want balance and I don't have control over that balance. So what are the rules. Do I meet the criteria of a homosexual or bisexual? I think if I don't settle this issue. It will drastically affect how I associate with men.